The Humor List
 

TRAFFIC REPORT FOR APRIL 2018

TRAFFIC REPORT MENU
1. Welcome And Comments

2. Humor List Staff
3. Contributors' Tips
4. Become A Contributor
5. Traffic Report
6. Contributors' Daily Submission Counts
7. Humor List Goals
8. The 10 Basic Rules
9. Subscribing Instructions
10. Navigating Simplelists
11. Finding the Archives
12. Follow us on Social Media
13. Doug's Traditional Humor Contribution
14. The Humor List Website Navigation

WELCOME TO THE MONTH OF: APRIL 2018
Hi, everyone, this is Doug and Sandy, with this month's Traffic Report - our ninth month as a subscriber-supported group and our wonderful contributors continue to break records with a fury!! Our Contributors are the best!! If you read a post that you particularly liked - a little "fan mail" to the contributor is always welcomed! Just remember to hit the "Reply" on the email and do not send your personal message to the whole group!

Once a month, during the first part of the month, the Traffic Report is posted to the entire humor list. We're doing something a little different - posting the monthly Traffic Report directly to our website and providing everyone a link.

Doug: You may have noticed that I got mentioned for posting every day in April. I don't have a library of humor like a lot of the contributors, but I have some ideas for posting quite a few times this month. You can look for me more often.

Sandy: Always trying to improve our website, we've added a new "History" folder, with a summary of yearly statistics (finally completed) AND a listing of anniversary dates for our past and current contributors. Seeing as Doug's records contain 2,700 members that obtained the status of "Contributor" - the website list is not a complete listing - it just lists contributors that had a major impact on the UGA/The Humor List. If you find a contributor that is missing from our list, and you feel should be added, let us know! <Please Add>

* A very special mention to the 6 Contributors that posted daily for April 2018! The list of daily contributors keeps getting longer each month!!
    Sandy (AKA MsSam) -14th Consecutive Month
    Humoress1 - 8th Consecutive Month
    Paul "PBen" Benoit - 4th Consecutive Month
    Earl "Hi Verchal" Hall - 4th Consecutive Month
    Doug Harter - 1st Full Month
    Bill Eagle - 1st Full Month


 ** It continues being quite impressive what our dedicated contributors are doing again this month!  What a remarkable job with 452 posts for April! Our yearly average for the first 4 months of 2018 remains at 15.1 jokes per day - ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC!!

If you have a complaint or comment regarding a post - send it to: admin1@thehumorlist.us
If you have a complaint or comment regarding the Traffic Report - send it to: comments@thehumorlist.us
(This report updated with current information: February 2018)
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THE HUMOR LIST STAFF IS COMPRISED OF: 
Sandy (AKA MsSam): Member Services, Correspondence, and "Rules Cop" - admin1@thehumorlist.us
Doug Harter: Assistant Admin, Archivist, and Traffic Reporter - traffic@thehumorlist.us
Maurizio Mariotti: Twitter Account Management - twitter@thehumorlist.us
Bill Edwards: Founder and List-Owner Emeritus 
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** CONTRIBUTORS' TIPS **
MAY CHALLENGE
January 2018, a month with 31 days, we set a record high. Without duplicates and not exceeding the 3 jokes per day maximum, let's do it again! May also has 31 days and that gives us an extra day for submissions - which makes the challenge a little easier!!

WHAT ARE THE CURRENT POSTING RESTRICTIONS?
Originally The Humor List "Rules" stated that only 1 post per day was allowed. Since then, that restriction was lifted and multiple posts were allowed. It has been noted that recently some contributors are overly zealous in their desire to share humorous posts - creating massive Digests for subscribers. Doug and I have discussed a reasonable compromise and now have set limits at no more than 3 posts, per email address, per "posting day".

POLITICAL POSTS
While there is nothing specifically restricting the topic of politics in The Rules, the Admin Staff is requesting contributors avoid posting political-oriented jokes. We are requesting this moratorium because of the increasing level of complaints we've been receiving. Most subscribers enjoy reading the posts because it's a brief and entertaining escape from the depressing, 24/7 exposure to political news. Contributors and subscribers who wish to read, post or share politically themed items are welcome to do so on the many social media sites designed for just that purpose.

DUPLICATES, DUPLICATES, DUPLICATES!
What does the Admin Staff consider a "duplicate"? Any joke that was contributed within the past 6 months - and reformatting an old joke does not change the basic punchline and make it a non-duplicate.  Remember, a duplicate post will count towards the daily posting totals, but unless you've submitted multiple, non-duplicated jokes that day, you will not have a post that counts towards your "Days Contributed" total. To provide a tool for searching recent posts, there's a new website for contributors only. For the URL and/or assistance with the new searching ability, contact the Admin Staff.

Posting restrictions and suspensions WILL RESULT for continued duplicate posting!! Need we say more?

PLEASE - BE CONSIDERATE
Recently, we have been enjoying a larger number of daily posts, so our nightly Digests are longer than usual. Please do not post large files. Limit lists to +/- 20 sets (Q&A/riddles, quotes, taglines, etc.). Break larger lists and send on multiple days - then don't forget to include the Warning Label <long>.


Archive for Tips and Tricks

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BECOME A CONTRIBUTOR
We have the best group of contributors - some posting every day and some posting multiple times daily. If you'd like information on how to join this elite group of merry men (and women) - send one of the Admin staff an email and we'll gladly answer all your questions. Everyone subscribing to The Humor List is encouraged to become a Contributor. Send your humor to thehumorlist@simplelists.com.
- Keep in mind that new Contributors are moderated until they can demonstrate an understanding and compliance of The Rules.
- You will not immediately see your posts (if you receive individual postings) until they are approved by Doug or Sandy.
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TRAFFIC REPORT
Total Jokes Submitted This Month (452)
WEEK SUN MON TUE WED THU FRI SAT
#1 16 12 17 18 14 18 13
#2 12 15 12 17 17 17 13
#3 13 12 13 13 20 18 16
#4 14 18 15 14 12 17 20
#5 11 15 - - - - -

Total Contributors Submitting
WEEK SUN MON TUE WED THU FRI SAT
#1 9 10 10 12 10 11 10
#2 9 11 9 11 12 12 10
#3 10 10 9 10 15 12 13
#4 10 12 11 11 9 12 14
#5 9 9 - - - - -

Statistical Comparisons
  April 2018 March 2018 April 2017 April 2016
# Jokes for the Month: 452 458 161 130
# Submission Days for the Month: 30 31 30 30
# Average Jokes Per Day for the Month: 15.1 14.7 5.4 4.3
# Highest Joke Count in 1 Day 20 26 N/A N/A
# Highest Contributor Count in 1 Day 15 14 N/A N/A
# Contributors for the Month: 21 19 9 10
# Total Contributors: 23 23 12 13
# New Subscribers for the Month: 22 1 3 N/A
# Members Unsubscribed for the Month: 1 0 N/A 1
# Total Subscribers at end of the Month: 334 313 1464 1476

(1) The past statistics are based on addresses registered to our Listserver. It does not include addresses which receive HUMOR by other than direct mailings. The numbers include only non-concealed subscribers.
(2) While the information was interesting, because of the way mailing programs have become so universal, there's no way to accurately track the number of countries currently receiving The Humor List. We will be discontinuing the reporting of "Countries" in our monthly statistics.
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CONTRIBUTORS' DAILY SUBMISSION COUNTS
* Contributed every day of the available month!.
On the "Daily Submission Counts", although more than one joke may be submitted per day, only one (non-duplicate) submission per day is countable for those totals. Submission dates are currently based upon Pacific Daylight Saving Time (2400-2400).
Contributor Posting Order From 04/01/2018 to 04/30/2018
* Sandy (AKA MsSam) 30
* Humoress1 30
* Paul Benoit (PBen) 30
* Earl Hall (Hi Verchal) 30
* Doug Harter 30
* Bill Eagle 30
George Matyjewicz 28
Roger Hyman (A/Dodger) 25
March Warn 21
Maurizio Mariotti (Maury) 17
Grady Lacy 13
Lee Bradley (T.O.P.) 6
Ray Powell 5
Anna Welander 5
Mickey Hennigan 4
Randall Woodman 4
Phil G 3
Lanny Julian 2
Traffic Report/Admin 2
1 Submission Each: Larry Randall, Robert Bragner (RLB)
Monthly Data
Yearly Data
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HUMOR GOALS:
A daily average of 5-10 examples of humor.
A diversity of humor: sources, forms, subjects.
Freedom of expression for contributors.
Protection of sensitivities for readers (Subject Line Warning Requirement).
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THE HUMOR LIST 10 BASIC RULES (here's the simplified version):
(1) Seven rules protect HUMOR members from excessive traffic.
- Only substantial examples of humor should be posted.
- Discussion, requests, criticisms, questions should not be posted.
- No personal attacks.
- Conserve bandwidth: Avoid blank lines. No ASCII files. No signature file preferred.
- While multiple posts are allowed, limit posts to NO MORE THAN 3 per day.
- NO SPAMMING! A spammer will receive one warning before they are deleted and blocked. This is that one warning!
- NO links or attached files - with the exception of official business by the administrators.

(2) Three rules protect HUMOR from complaints.
- Subject line should disclose the subject of the humor.
- Subject line should include warning if potentially offensive.
- A CONTRIBUTOR WHO REPEATEDLY VIOLATES ANY OF THESE RULES, AFTER BEING WARNED, WILL BE SUSPENDED.

If you have a complaint or comment regarding a post - send it to: admin1@thehumorlist.us
Full list of Rules: http://thehumorlist.us/rules.htm
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SUBSCRIBING INSTRUCTIONS THROUGH SIMPLELISTS:
1) http://thehumorlist.us/subscribe.htm

2) The one-time subscriber fee is now $14.95 for one email address or $19.95 for two email addresses.

3) After payment through PayPal, you will be directed back to the Humor List website. Because PayPal and SIMPLELISTS are not directly connected, there is a second step that must be completed. Please continue by adding your subscription information to the SimpleLists form.

4) One of the factors in deciding to allow SIMPLELISTS to become our new mailing list service was their strict anti-spamming policy. After completing the SIMPLELIST form, you will be sent a "Request to join mailing list thehumorlist@simplelists.com" email with a confirmation link. Be sure to confirm your email address. If a subscriber has not "confirmed" their email address - SIMPLELISTS will not allow us to include their email address for daily mailings.
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NAVIGATING SIMPLELISTS
Effective August 1, 2017, The Humor List became a subscriber-supported list, with our list-mailing service being managed through SIMPLELISTS. New information is now available for subscriptions, 12 months of current archives, and account management. You will also find all of this information on every post you receive.

SUBSCRIBE: The most current information, prices, and possible specials, will be posted on our website. We only accept PayPal for membership fees.

TO BECOME A SUPPORTING MEMBER: http://thehumorlist.us/subscribe.htm

TO CONTROL YOUR ACCOUNT SETTINGS: http://archives.simplelists.com/

TO UNSUBSCRIBE FROM THE HUMOR LIST: Individualized link is included on every email that subscribers received.

24-HOUR POSTING TIMES FOR DIGESTS: Midnight to midnight, PDT (UTC minus 08 hours) and 11:00 PM to 11:00 PM PST  (UTC minus 07 hours).
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FINDING THE ARCHIVES
These are the current sites for the archives:
Daily Humor Posts, Digests, and Yearly and Monthly Traffic Reports
Pre-August 2017 (Available to the public)
http://archive.thehumorlist.us/Site1

Daily Humor Posts
Post-August 2017 (Members only)
https://archives.simplelists.com/thehumorlist
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FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA
The Humor List on Facebook US ON FACEBOOK: 
https://www.facebook.com/The-Humor-List-241979695844031/

FOLLOW US ON The Humor List on Twitter
https://twitter.com/The_Humor_List
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DOUG'S TRADITIONAL HUMOR CONTRIBUTION
And finally, the one feature which has been featured in all Traffic Reports, the contribution of Humor. Since, I am not a real regular contributor, I will not be providing new Humor. Instead, I will provide a joke from the archives. It will be at least 14 months old, so most of you won't remember it. This is my contribution of Humor from the Archives:

This joke is #4 in the Digest for: 05/09/04
Link: http://archive.thehumorlist.us/Site1/Digests/H0405090.php#Joke4

From: Sandy (AKA MsSam)
Subject: SOMEBODY SAID

Joke: SOMEBODY SAID:
Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby ... somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "normal" is history.

Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct ... somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.

Somebody said being a mother is boring ... somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.

Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out good" ... somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.

Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices ... somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.

Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother ... somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.

Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first ... somebody doesn't have more than one child.

Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books ... somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose.

Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery ... somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.

Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back ... somebody never organized seven giggling Girl Scouts to sell cookies.

Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married ... somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.

Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home ... somebody never had grandchildren.

Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her ... somebody isn't a mother.
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Doug Harter, Asst. Admin, Traffic Reporter, and Archivist
Sandy (AKA MsSam) - Member Services, Correspondence, and "Rules Cop"
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