The Humor List
 

TRAFFIC REPORT FOR MARCH 2017

1. Introductory Comments
2. How to Contribute
3. Archive Information
4. Traffic Report
5. Countries Information
6. Number Submissions By Hour
7. Top 15 Contributors
8. HumorList Information
9 Changes - August 2017

10. Contribution of Humor
11. Site Navigation

Hi, everyone, this is Doug, with this month's Traffic Report. Once a month, during the first part of the month, I send the report to the entire HUMOR list. Welcome to the month of March, 2017. If you have a complaint or comment regarding a post - send it to: comments@thehumorlist.us On all reports, the totals are for 'days submitted' and not for the actual number of jokes submitted. Although more than one joke may be submitted per day, for the 'Daily Submission' count, only one submission per day is countable for these totals. Submission dates are based upon Eastern Time.

Remember Saturday Night Live's infamous, "Ohh Nooo Mr. Bill"? Unfortunately, that has been us this year. There are a number of circumstances that we have little control over and sadly, it's severely impacting our subscribers. There have been several complaints lodged against the IP Address we share with other domains, resulting in our email delivery being blocked by several major mailing systems. This means many of our readers are not receiving their individual or digest mailings, even though our group meets and follows all the "anti-spam" regulations. Either (1) another domain on the same server is spamming, (2) One of our members has been unable to unsubscribe and voiced their complaint to their email provider rather than our management, or (3) We've been hacked.

We are working with our server provider, attempting to find the source of the problem and correct it. Please have patience with us. We are a free, non-profit group, which means all of the time, energies and expenses are shared by "management" and we are totally committed to seeing this group continue for many more years!

So ... why are we sending this out, knowing those who are affected won't be receiving this information? This is where we need your help! Please share this information with member-friends that might have been impacted. Let them know that we are aware of the problem and have been working towards a resolution.

Current Traffic Reports will be posted on our main website, with a link available on the Traffic Report Index and here, until they are transferred to this portion of the Archives.

This is the Main Index, with current links for the archives - with HTML copies of Digests and Yearly and Monthly Traffic Reports: http://archive.thehumorlist.us/Site1/index.php

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Anyone subscribing to HumorList may post if they wish. Send your humor to: thehumorlist@simplelists.us
- Keep in mind that new Contributors are moderated until you can abide by The Rules.
- You will not see your posts (if you get individual postings) until they are approved.
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Traffic Report for March 2017

Week Sun Mon Tues Wed Thurs Fri Sat
1       12 3 7 5
2 5 7 7 6 5 8 5
3 5 5 4 8 8 6 7
4 7 4 9 7 5 5 6
5 3 4 8 8 5 4  

 





  Mar 2017 Feb 2017 Mar 2016 Mar 2015
# Jokes for the Month: 187 148 126 156
# Days of submissions for the Month: 31 28 31 31
# Average Jokes per day for the Month: 6 5 4 5
# Contributors for the Month: 11 11 10 13
# New Subscribers for the Month: 3 2 3 1
# Members Unsubscribed for the Month: 5 3 2 5
# Non-Concealed Subscribers at end of the Month: 1458 1461 1478 1494
# Contributors at end of the Month: 12 12 11 17
# Countries at end of the Month: 41 41 41 41

The above statistics are based on addresses registered to our Listserver. It does not include addresses which receive HUMOR by other than direct mailings. The numbers include only non-concealed subscribers.
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The HumorList is sent daily to the following countries:
Argentine, Australia, Austria, Belgium, Brazil, Bulgaria, Canada, Cocos Islands, Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Hong Kong, Hungary, India, Iran, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Japan, Luxembourg, Malaysia, Mexico, Micronesia, Netherlands, New Zealand, Portugal, Romania, Russia, Singapore, Slovakia, South Africa, Sweden, Taiwan, Turkey, Tuvalu, United Kingdom, and the USA.

The countries list is generated from the last part of your email address. If your address doesn't end with a country name, it is assumed to be from the USA.
 
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Number Submissions By Hour
00-11 15 1 1 0 0 1 5 7 4 8 26 21
12-23 38 6 13 11 4 8 6 2 3 4 3 1
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And now, the Top 11 Contributors
This will show you which Contributors are sending the most daily contributions of Humor each month. Those who are posting every day are noted.
Top 11 Contributors from 3/1/2017 to 3/31/2017
*Sandy (AKA MsSam) 31
*Paul Benoit 31
George Matyjewicz 30
Maurizio Mariotti 29
Ray Powell 15
Mickey Hennigan 7
Lee Bradley 7
Grady Lacy 7
Richard Nehrbass 5
Lanny Julian 5
Phil G 1
* - Contributed Every Digest/Day
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The Humor staff is comprised of:
SANDY (Member Services, Correspondence, and "Rules Cop")
    admin1@thehumorlist.us
DOUG (The Technical Guru that holds us together, Archivist, and Traffic Reporter)
    traffic@thehumorlist.us

Bill Edwards, Founder and Listowner Emeritus
 
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HUMOR GOALS: A daily average of 5-10 examples of humor.
A diversity of humor: sources, forms, subjects.
Freedom of expression for contributors.
Protection of sensitivities for readers (heading warning requirement).

HUMOR CONTRIBUTOR RULES (brief version):
Subject line should disclose the subject of the humor.
Subject line should include warning if potentially offensive.
Only substantial examples of verbal humor should be posted.
Discussion, requests, and criticisms are not to be posted.
No personal attacks, apologies, reactions or retractions.
Conserve bandwidth: Avoid blank lines; No ASCII art or signature file.
NO SPAMMING! A spammer will receive one warning before they are deleted and blocked. This is that one warning!
NO links or attached files - with the exception of official business by the administrators.

A CONTRIBUTOR WHO REPEATEDLY VIOLATES THE RULES, AFTER BEING WARNED, WILL BE SUSPENDED.

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EFFECTIVE AUGUST 1, 2017
The Humor List became a subscriber-supported list, with our list-mailing service being managed through SimpleLists. New information is now available for subscriptions, 12 months of current archives, and account management. We also have pages on both Facebook and Twitter.

SUBSCRIBE: The most current information, prices, and possible specials, will be posted on our website. We only accept PayPal for membership fees.

TO BECOME A SUPPORTING MEMBER: http://thehumorlist.us/subscribe.htm


TO CONTROL YOUR ACCOUNT SETTINGS: http://archives.simplelists.com/


TO UNSUBSCRIBE FROM THE HUMOR LIST: Individualized link included on every email subscribers received.

 
TO FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/The-Humor-List-241979695844031/


TO FOLLOW US ON TWITTER: https://twitter.com/search?q=the_humor_list&src=typd


CONTRIBUTORS - SUBMIT POSTS TO: thehumorlist@simplelists.com


24-HOUR POSTING TIMES FOR DIGESTS: Midnight to midnight, PDT (UTC minus 08 hours) and 11:00 PM to 11:00 PM PST  (UTC minus 07 hours).

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And finally, the one feature which has been featured in all Traffic Reports, the contribution of Humor. Since, I am not a real regular contributor, I will not be providing new Humor. Instead, I will provide a joke from the archives. It will be at least 14 months old, so most of you won't remember it. This is my contribution of Humor from the Archives:

This joke is joke #18 in the Digest For 3/27/1996
From: Terry Galan
Subject: Smile ...

The other day I went to the local religious book store, where I saw a HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car, and I'm really glad I did. What an uplifting experience followed!

I was stopped at the light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord, and didn't notice that the light had changed. That bumper sticker really worked! I found lots of people who love Jesus.

Why, the guy behind me started to honk like crazy. He must REALLY love the Lord because pretty soon, he leaned out his window and yelled, "Jesus Christ!" as loud as he could. It was like a football game with him shouting, "GO JESUS CHRIST,GO!"

Everyone else started honking, too, so I leaned out my window and waved and smiled to all of those loving people.

There must have been a guy from Florida back there because I could hear him yelling something about a sunny beach, and saw him waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air.

I asked my two kids what that meant. They kind of squirmed, looked at each other, giggled and told me that it was the Hawaiian good luck sign. So, I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back.

Several cars behind, a very nice black man stepped out of his car and yelled something. I couldn't hear him very well, but it sounded like, "Mother trucker," or "Mother's from there." Maybe he was from Florida, too. He must really love the Lord.

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and were walking toward me. I bet they wanted to pray, but just then I noticed that the light had changed to yellow, and stepped on the gas.

And a good thing I did, because I was the only driver to get across the intersection. I looked back at them standing there. I leaned way out the window, gave them a big smile and held up the Hawaiian good luck sign as I drove away.

Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks.
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 Doug Harter, Asst. Admin, Traffic Reporter and Archivist
		
 
 
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