Traffic Report For March 2013
If you have a complaint or comment regarding a post - send it to: email@example.com On any reports, the totals are for 'days submitted' and not for the actual number of jokes submitted. Submission dates are based upon Eastern Time. Although more than one joke may be submitted per day, for the 'Daily Submission' count, only one submission per day is countable for these totals.
I am really sorry to all the subscribers for the slowness of updating everything. I lost my hard drive on March 20. The main problem was when I got it back, I also upgraded to Windows 7. It took me until the end of May to get necessary files back from the old hard drive, upgrade necessary programs, and get the program that does all this back in shape. I can't work on all that 24/7.
I will start about the end of May and get the Digests and Traffic Reports for each month out a week at a time. I should be back up-to-date by the end of June. Until then you will be seeing this every month in the Traffic Report.
Back to Top = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = Anyone subscribing to HumorList may post if they wish. Send your humor to
Doug Harter, Assistant Admin, Archivist and Traffic Reporter
Bill Edwards, Founder and Listowner Emeritus HUMOR GOALS A daily average of 5-10 examples of humor. A diversity of humor: sources, forms, subjects. Freedom of expression for contributors. Protection of sensitivities for readers (heading warning requirement). HUMOR CONTRIBUTOR RULES (brief version) Subject line should disclose the subject of the humor. Subject line should include warning if potentially offensive. One contribution per day. Only substantial examples of verbal humor should be posted. Discussion, requests, and criticisms are not to be posted. No personal attacks, apologies, reactions or retractions. Articles should normally be shorter than 25 lines (99 lines max). Conserve bandwidth: Avoid blank lines; No ASCII art or sig file. A contributor who violates the rules may be suspended. Back to Top = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = Subscribe to The Humor List by going to The Humor List Mailing Group , scrolling down to 'Subscribing to Humorlist' and filling in the information. OR Sending an email to
with 'subscribe' (no quotes) in the Subject or Body of the email. Back to Top - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Making Changes by The Web Each Subscriber gets a Membership Configuration Page where you must sign in with the password you were given when you subscribed. You get to it by going to The Humor List Mailing Group , scrolling down to 'Unsubscribe or edit options' (Under 'Humorlist Subscribers') and filling in your email address. This will take you to another page where you enter your password to get to your Membership Configuration Page. Here are some things that may be done on that page: o Unsubscribe from HumorList o Turn Mail Delivery On/Off o Turn Digest On/Off (Off sends individual postings). o Set a Name for your email address o Change your email address o Change your password 0 Get a password reminder Back to Top - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - You may also make changes by Email by sending an email to
with one of the following in the Subject or Body of the email (words in () are not needed, they just explain what you can do): o unsubscribe (from HumorList) o set show (Show your current option settings) o help (Returns help on email commands) o set help (Returns help on the Set options) o password (Returns your current password) There are several other things which may be done, but they require that you include your password in the email. Use these options with caution. o password oldpassword newpassword (Changes password) The following must be preceded by the following command: set authenticate password (password is the password you got when you subscribed) o set digest plain (Get Digests in plain text format) o set digest mime (Get Digests in MIME format) o set digest off (Get individual postings o set delivery off (Stops postings or Digests) o set delivery on (Starts postings or Digests again) o set reminders off (Turns off monthly password reminder) o set reminders on (Turns on monthly password reminder) Back to Top = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = And finally, the one feature which has been featured in all Traffic Reports, the contribution of Humor. Since, I am not a real regular contributor, I will not be providing new Humor. Instead, I will provide a joke from the archives. It will be at least 14 months old, so most of you won't remember it. You will either see the joke below or a link to the joke, not the actual joke, although I will provide the Subject line (Topic). Since there are now HTML versions of all Digests, it will point to the joke itself. My contribution of Humor from the Archives:
From: Paul Leakas Subject:CIA agent requirments <might be offensive to wives> Three men walk into the CIA headquarters and ask to be hired. A man there replies, OK, but first we have to test your loyalty. He says to the first man, "Here's a gun to prove your loyalty. We have your wife in the other room. Go shoot her." So he goes in and he comes out fifteen minutes later and says, "I tried, but I just can not do it." So the next guy goes in and the same thing happens. So the last guy goes in & sees his wife sitting there. The man who is testing him is waiting to here gunshots, and then he hears BANG... BANG... BANG BANG BANG BANG. Then tons of crashing and banging. The man with the gun comes out, and the man who is testing him says, "Congratulations! You are now a member of the CIA," to which the man replies "Yea, great, thanks but some idiot put blanks in the gun! I had to kill her with the chair!" ------------------------------= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = Doug Harter, Asst. Admin, Traffic Reporter and Archiver
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