The Humor List Postings for May 2003

Updated on Tuesday, May 22, 2007 at 09:35 AM
The Humor List archives are being graciously hosted by Host995

This is both an index of the text and zip files for the month and a day by day listing of the joke titles. If you are looking for a particular joke, search for the words in its title using the browser find command.

Below is a list of the links for each day. Each link will bring you to the Topics for that day. Each day will also have a link to the .txt, .zip and HTML files for that day

Topics for May
1st 2nd 3rd 4th 5th
6th 7th 8th 9th 10th
11th 12th 13th 14th 15th
16th 17th 18th 19th 20th
21st 22nd 23rd 24th 25th
26th 27th 28th 29th 30th
31st        

At the end of all the topics is a table of links to all the months for the year of this index.
1st of May Topics of the day:
Txt File
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  1. U.S. Captures Three More Pokemon Cards
  2. THURSDAY ~ May 1st ~ May Day
  3. Friends Forever!
  4. Dilemma.....
  5. Act of God <amy be off. to the religious>
  6. The Lord understood
  7. ED: How cold is it, Johnny?
  8. Medical vs Mechanical Care, Takes 1 & 2
  9. The Honeymoon is over
  10. Signs
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2nd of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Test Shows 99.99% of High School Seniors Cant Read Perl
  2. Comic Books < nerd alert >
  3. Hitting The Bottle <adult>
  4. The newlywed [Adult these and language]
  5. Converting a Bear.....
  6. Marooned!
  7. Sons
  8. The ring <clean, pragmatic>
  9. FRIDAY ~ May 2nd ~ Take Baby to Lunch Day
  10. How To Give Your Cat A Pill:
  11. Traffic Report for April 2003
  12. Scam Warning
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3rd of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Treats
  2. Marriage Is A Contract...
  3. Southern Buddies
  4. Seatbelts (Possibly offensive to the seatbelt-challanged)
  5. Review: Bob Hope Entertains Troops with New, Confusing Show
  6. New Eauro Language.....
  7. Something I wish I had said
  8. SATURDAY ~ May 3rd ~ Primal Teachers Day
  9. Hallmark cards wed like to see
  10. 82 years young
  11. Scaredy cats at SF zoo
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4th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. All In a Days Work
  2. The Cajun Ten Commandments
  3. Todays Parable at the Church Of Chuckles <prob. blasphemous>
  4. The English Language.....
  5. Twas The Night Before Finals
  6. N. Koreas Nuclear Activities "Youthful Experimentation"
  7. A Potato Story
  8. SUNDAY ~ May 4th ~ Naked Day
  9. The make-up game
  10. Sentimental fellow
  11. More signs
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5th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Cinco de Mayo - May 5th
  2. You Know You Are In Trouble When:
  3. Spelling Chequer.....
  4. His credit card
  5. Iraqi Construction Contracts Awarded to Old Man Potter
  6. Christian One-Liners
  7. Did they really say that?!
  8. MONDAY ~ May 5th ~ Cumulinas Old Age Day
  9. Golf and dentures
  10. Everything I Needed To Know In Life I Learned From A Jigsaw Puzzle
  11. Republican theory tax cut responce from my dem post
  12. Motion lotion
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6th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Xbox Features Active Death Technology
  2. TUESDAY ~ May 6th ~ National Teachers Day
  3. "Your fly is undone," was The Old Perfessers zippy rejoinder.
  4. It Was A Sign
  5. A Couple Of Smiles.....
  6. The Harvard freshman [Adult language]
  7. Women Believe...
  8. Drummers (Pos. offensive to P-Ben)
  9. Cannibals
  10. English pronunciation - part deux
  11. Horny mans alphabet<adult>
  12. Turn a boat is fair play?
  13. Mothers day
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7th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Bill Bennett Loses Wife In Poker Game
  2. Jury Duty
  3. WEDNESDAY ~ May 7th ~ American Medical Association Birthday
  4. Oh, Mother
  5. On-Line Bookstore
  6. A Couple Of Smirks.....
  7. The computers answer
  8. Noah <maybe off. to the religious & a major groaner>
  9. Whats Wrong?
  10. Betting <adultish>
  11. Man to wife
  12. Wrong fax number
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8th of May Topics of the day:
Txt File
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  1. Success of Apple Music Store Proves Apple Users Will Overpay for Anything
  2. Mens Health < dog traits mentioned >
  3. Signs Youve Chosen a "No Frills" Airline
  4. Energized!
  5. Bubba and Clem
  6. Notice To People Who Visit My Home.....
  7. The part
  8. listening through the keyhole<adult>
  9. THURSDAY ~ May 8th ~ Be Kind To Animals Week
  10. Prayer Time
  11. Change of clothes
  12. A Mother with Two Toddlers
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9th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Ozzy Osbourne Speaks Out Against the U.S. Invasion of Grenada
  2. FRIDAY ~ May 9th ~ Birth Control Approval Day <Adult>
  3. Send Lawyers, Guns and Money....
  4. Too Lazy
  5. A prescription is required
  6. Sometimes we speak before we think <adultish>
  7. marketing strategies (sexual)
  8. Food Punnies.....
  9. Prescription
  10. Mans Prayer <adult>
  11. Swim
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10th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Scientists Discover "French" Gene
  2. JOB
  3. She Was So Blonde ... ...
  4. Converting a Bear.....
  5. Interpreting the Commandments
  6. Trees [Adultish]
  7. SATURDAY ~ May 10th ~ Liptons Birthday
  8. Old timers (adultish)
  9. Little Dorothy
  10. Kittens
  11. free sex
  12. Sunday Gathering at the Church Of Chuckles <prob. blasphemous>
  13. that aint no rash
  14. LOAN
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11th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Disappointed Los Angeles Vows To Regain "Looting Capital Of The World" Title
  2. SUNDAY ~ May 11th ~ Mothers Day
  3. letters from home
  4. Quick Answers.....
  5. E-mail Virus Alert
  6. grandpas collage vist
  7. Never say to a cop . . .
  8. Breath mint
  9. Late-Braking News: new Georgia flag
  10. What A Bill!
  11. Lettermans Top Ten...
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12th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Secret Military Service Revealed
  2. Smiles.....
  3. Conflicting Proverbs
  4. Another blonde...
  5. Baseball <a groaner>
  6. MONDAY ~ May 12th ~ National Nurses Day/Week
  7. Search For WMD
  8. The Stance
  9. Sex vouchers
  10. Ring Ring
  11. Tithing lady (adultish)
  12. After the Party
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13th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. "Has my magazine arrived?" The Old Perfesser asked periodically.
  2. TUESDAY ~ May 13th ~ U.S. Olympics Day
  3. Why did the chicken cross the road???
  4. Five affairs
  5. Bush Calls For Regime Change in France
  6. Fun Things to do During Boring Sermons
  7. Garden of Eden<adult&lang&off to women>
  8. Tuning Up The Old House Organ
  9. Honesty
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14th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. The Law
  2. Wine
  3. Globalization
  4. Disgruntled Clippy Accused Of Leaking Microsoft Licensing Key
  5. The haircut <clean, pathetic>
  6. WEDNESDAY ~ May 14th ~ Star Wars Day
  7. Late For Final
  8. If Jesus had used a management consultant (May be offensive to some)
  9. Sporty Bobbys
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15th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Have Fun
  2. Southern Thinking <adult>
  3. Language
  4. Top stories from todays New York Times, as told by former reporter Jayson Blair
  5. THURSDAY ~ May 15th ~ National Peace Officers Memorial Day
  6. The Defendant
  7. Not offensive
  8. honestly
  9. Serviceman
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16th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Saddams Decadent Lifestyle <offensive to the decadenttly challenged>
  2. I Need A Drink
  3. Yorkshire Folk
  4. Semper Ubi Sub Ubi.....
  5. Hows that again?
  6. Hillary
  7. Doctor, Doctor <mildly adultish & a groaner>
  8. The golf game
  9. lesson spills on me milk
  10. The Exam
  11. Callowfornia News Special Retort - Sheriff Seeks Funds to Fight Terrorism, Win Reelection
  12. FRIDAY ~ May 16th ~ Kindergarten Day
  13. married.
  14. Linguistic Over-reaching
  15. Green thumb
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17th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. JEOPARDY!
  2. Oh, Those French!!!
  3. The blonde speeder
  4. Late At Night
  5. SATURDAY ~ May 17th ~ Armed Forces Day
  6. Cough Cure
  7. Amish elevator
  8. Math Progress
  9. Pickup line
  10. Todays Prayer at the Church Of Chuckles <prob. blasphemous>
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18th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. WWJD
  2. Mostly Men Bashing.....
  3. Southern signs
  4. Unruly Youngster
  5. SUNDAY ~ May 18th ~ Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County
  6. boy wanted $100<lang>
  7. Klingonese
  8. Shw was Frantic !!
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19th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Heres Looking At You... <adult, gross>
  2. A penny for his thoughts
  3. The Chaos
  4. MONDAY ~ May 19th ~ Ringling Brothers Circus Birthday (ADULT)
  5. Another Blonde story
  6. Weekly World News Fires Reporter Over Batboy Story
  7. George Dubya - ever the politician
  8. AH, THE GOOD BOAT LIFE
  9. FW: Blonde Joke
  10. Bridal registry
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20th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. TUESDAY ~ May 20th ~ Emergency Medical Service Workers Week (May 18-24, 2003) <Maybe Offensive>
  2. Taglines for your pharmacist....
  3. "My parents were named Billy and Nanny," The Old Perfesser kidded.
  4. A puppy dog message
  5. Late for Work
  6. Honesty
  7. That Figures...
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21st of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Wonder Woman and Supergirl
  2. Life is like a box of chocolates...
  3. WEDNESDAY ~ May 21st ~ National Waiters and Waitresses Day <ADULT>
  4. How much money?
  5. Smiles.....
  6. Grave new threat <maybe off to the religious>
  7. Kids!
  8. WMD Riddle.
  9. Proof of death
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22nd of May Topics of the day:
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  1. q u o t e s
  2. The Cabinet
  3. Kids In Church.....
  4. History [ADULTISH LANGUAGE]
  5. THURSDAY ~ May 22nd ~ Gemini (May 22 - Jun 21)
  6. Bet You Didnt Know (or How Things Were In The 1500s)
  7. fill it ip .............DAMMIT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  8. Bureau of Engraving and Printing
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23rd of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Wet Paint
  2. Cop lines
  3. For The Birds!
  4. A new virus
  5. One Word Or Two???
  6. The Diver
  7. FRIDAY ~ May 23rd ~ Canadian Mounties Day
  8. Damn Liberals!
  9. JAY, DOROTHY & T.S <adult>
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24th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. A very clever little girl
  2. A New World Health Organisation Warning Issued
  3. 15 Minutes As A Lawyer.....
  4. When Winners Work For Losers
  5. SATURDAY ~ May 24th ~ Designated Driver Memorial Day Weekend
  6. Ambitions
  7. Did I send this to you already? I cant remember...
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25th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Sunday Sermon at the Church Of Chuckles <prob. blasphemous>
  2. NEXT TIME YOU HAVE A BBQ.....
  3. Charisma
  4. motherhood
  5. Dating
  6. Money
  7. SUNDAY ~ May 25th ~ First doctor to have office hours in space (1973)
  8. Inspection
  9. Uniformed Humor <adult>
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26th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. P.J.ORourke <sexual arousal mentioned>
  2. An uninvited guest
  3. We Honor Our Fallen Soldiers on Memorial Day
  4. Hunting Doctors
  5. Still another anti-Clinton joke
  6. MONDAY ~ May 26th ~ Memorial Day
  7. Beauty insured
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27th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Little
  2. Why Hebrew is Better than Brewed Coffee!
  3. My affliction
  4. Are You Jewish?
  5. TUESDAY ~ May 27th ~ 1647, First American Execution of a Witch (ADULT)
  6. Car towed
  7. LBNN News: France demoted to #3
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28th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. WEDNESDAY ~ May 28th ~ Slugs Return From Capistrano <ADULT>
  2. Groucho Marx [1895-1977] US comedian, member of the Marx Brothers
  3. Is a Book on Voyeurism a Peeping Tome? <CAUTION: PUNS>
  4. THIS IS TO FUNNY!!!
  5. Getting things done
  6. Kitchen Signs
  7. Appoplectic Apostrophes
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29th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. In The Band
  2. Every Man Should Marry...
  3. Actual Marketing Flops.....
  4. What she REALLY wanted was to be six again!!!
  5. Three Reverend Men <may be off. to the religious>
  6. THURSDAY ~ May 29th ~ Presidential Flag Day
  7. Kids Say The Darndest Things
  8. Forgivness
  9. =?iso-8859-1?Q?In_Days_of_Old_=28risqu=E9=29?=
  10. Spelling
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30th of May Topics of the day:
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  1. 100
  2. FRIDAY ~ May 30th ~ Fountain of Youth Day
  3. A Couple Of Smirks.....
  4. Howd I Get Here???
  5. Her idea of a perfect evening
  6. Armchair philosophy
  7. Kids On The Bible
  8. Advice from the elderly
  9. Second hand smoke
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31st of May Topics of the day:
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  1. Michael Jackson on Crutches
  2. BEANS <adult>
  3. Truisms Of Golf.....
  4. WORK VS PRISON
  5. Benevolence
  6. SATURDAY ~ May 31st ~ Lady Gadiva Day
  7. Kids On Religion
  8. Women on the Job
  9. Wall Street lingo
  10. unday Sermon at the Church Of Chuckles <prob. blasphemous... adult!>
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2003 Indexes

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May June July August
September October November December