The Humor List
 

Digest for Sunday, February 09, 2014

Topics of the day:
1. INSURANCE (Paul Benoit)
2. Indebtedness (Grady Lacy)
3. Chaplain's visit <adult/language (Lee Bradley)
4. Three nuns <disrespectful/adult> (Maurizio Mariotti)
5. NSA Agent (Anna Welander)

________________________________________
Message: 1
Date: Mon, 10 Feb 2014 06:44:34 -0500
From: Paul Benoit
Subject: INSURANCE

I needed new health insurance, so I called up Blue Cross Blue Shield to apply.

The lady gets my name, goes through the preliminaries with me, and then she reads the first question: "Are you expecting to have emergency surgery in the next 6 months?"

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Message: 2
Date: Mon, 10 Feb 2014 07:31:46 -0500
From: Grady Lacy
Subject: Indebtedness

"If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I am prepared to forget it if they are." - Errol Flynn

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Message: 3
Date: Mon, 10 Feb 2014 07:58:03 -0500
From: Lee Bradley
Subject: Chaplain's visit <adult/language>

The chaplain was going to visit a far outpost of the Foreign Legion, far, far out in the desert, where the men were not accustomed to the polite conversations of civilized life.

On the arrival date, the chaplain was presented to the men by the captain, who urged the troops to be on their best behavior. "My fellow soldiers," began the chaplain, "I know life is hard out here,"

The captain interrupted, "And what's more, the first one of you cocksuckers who smarts off and says 'Not as hard as my dick' is gonna get two weeks of KP and a kick in the nuts!"

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Message: 4
Date: Mon, 10 Feb 2014 15:16:49 +0200
From: Maurizio Mariotti
Subject: Three nuns <disrespectful/adult>

Three nuns were taking a walk one day.

''I was cleaning the Father's room yesterday and found some pornography magazines," said the first nun.

"What did you do with them?" asked the second.

"I threw them away."

"I was cleaning the Father's room yesterday and found some condoms," said the second nun.

"What did you do with them?" asked the first.

"I punched holes in them."

The third nun fainted.

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Message: 5
Date: Fri, 7 Feb 2014 17:17:49 +0100
From: Anna Welander
Subject: NSA Agent

An NSA Agent walks into a bar. The Bartender says, "I've got a new joke for you."

The NSA Agent says, "I already heard it."

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